0055-CANDY

"So anyway, I'm like...listen here bitch, y'all got to make up your mind because I'm not gonna wait around forever you know...


"uh-huh"


"I mean, I really like her you know but..."


"uh-huh...oh fuck man, there's readers..."


"Shit...JESUS CHRIST MAN! help me I'm stuck in a Phone Booth and there's a guy trying to kill me..."


"Ok, listen man...whatever you do DON'T hang up the phone"


"But I wanna do poopy"


"Dude....too much information man...I gotta go....I need to call Candy anyway..."

*click*





*ring ring*






*ring ring*





*ring ring*






"Hi, you've reached Candy. Candy likes to talk dirty, Candy like it when you talk dirty to her. Candy wants cock so bad, Candy needs it now baby, spank Candy, hurt Candy, fuck Candy from behind baby, rape Candy, please, please...Candy will beg for your cock, Candy will do anything you want, give it to Candy now. Candy wants you to turn her around, rub your hands all over Candy, spread her wide open, split her apart, pinch Candy's nipples as you bite her neck and slide into her all heat and passion and hard baby, Candy wants it real hard, cum for Candy baby, cum for me, cum all over Candy baby...COVER CANDY IN CUM BABY!"



"Hi Candy, it's me"


"Oh...Hey Mom, How are you?"



"Ok dear, it's always nice to hear your voice...."


"You too Mom. How's Dad?"


"You know Dad..."


"Yeah...Candy put this in your mouth before daddy spanks you!"


"Hahahaha...yeah...."


"yeah...."


"Yeah....."


"Yeah....


"Yeah....."


"Yeah....


"Yeah....."


"Yeah....


"Yeah....."


"Yeah....ok Mom, well I better get back to work you know..."


"Yeah....."


"Yeah......."


"Yeah....."




*beep beep*





"Ok Mom, I've got to go, there's another call...I'll speak to you soon ok?"


"Yeah....."



*click*




"Hi, you've reached Candy. Candy likes to talk dirty, Candy like it when you talk dirty to her. Candy wants cock so bad, Candy needs it now baby, spank Candy, hurt Candy, fuck Candy from behind baby, rape Candy, please, please...Candy will beg for your cock, Candy will do anything you want, give it to Candy now...GIVE IT TO CANDY NOW! GIVE ME THAT COCK!"



[candycandycandycandycandy]


"Hello? You're voice is breaking up baby...do you want some of my sweet Candy?"



[candycandycandycandycandy]


"Yeah....right....I'm Candy. What's your name baby?""



[CANDY!CANDY!CANDY!CANDY!CANDY!CANDY!]


*beep beep*



"look sugar, I'll just put you on hold for one moment...Candy's got to answer another call..."



[candycandycandycandycandy]


*beep*



"Hi, you've reached Candy. Candy likes to talk dirty, Candy like it when you talk dirty to her. Candy wants cock so bad, Candy needs it now baby, spank Candy, hurt Candy, fuck Candy from behind baby, rape Candy, please, please...Candy will beg for your cock, Candy will do anything you want, give it to Candy now...GIVE IT TO CANDY NOW! GIVE ME THAT COCK!"




"banana!"


"Yeah...I want your banana baby...give me your banana!"



"EEEEEEE! MY BANANA!"


"Yeah...I want your banana baby...give me your banana!"



"EEEEEEE! MY BANANA!MY BANANA!!!"


"Yeah...I'm gonna take your banana baby, take it in my pussy"



"......."


"is that what you want baby? You want your banana in my pussy? In my arse? Yeah baby, push it in, push that banana all the way in!"



".......my banana?"


*beep beep*




"hang on baby..."



"eeeek!"


*beep*



"Hi, you've reached Candy. Candy likes to talk dirty, Candy like it when you talk dirty to her. Candy wants cock so bad, Candy needs it now baby, spank Candy, hurt Candy, fuck Candy from behind baby, rape Candy, please, please...Candy will beg for your cock, Candy will do anything you want, give it to Candy now. Candy wants you to turn her around, rub your hands all over Candy, spread her wide open, split her apart, pinch Candy's nipples as you bite her neck and slide into her all heat and passion and hard baby, Candy wants it real hard, cum for Candy baby, cum for me, cum all over Candy baby...COVER CANDY IN CUM BABY!"


"Yeah....."


"Mom! I'm trying to work..."


"Yeah....."

*beep beep*


"I've got to go mom..."

*click*


"Yeah it's motherfucking Candy, I'm licking your balls..."



"This is television's Eric Estrada and Eric wants...you!"


"Hey Eric, well baby, Candy wants you too baby..."



"You! Eric wants......YOU!"


"I want you too baby, I want you now..."



"Eric Estrada! Eric Estrada wants...YOU!"


"Jesus Eric...c'mon..."



"Eric Estrada wants....Eric Estrada wants....oh Candy, Eric Estrada wants his ole life back you know? Eric feels lonely and disenfranchised..."


"What about the Chips remake Eric? You know...you've got that to look forward to...A feature movie!"



"No, agent told Eric Estrada that the project had been shelved, afte that crappy remake of Starsky and Hutch..."


"Yeah...."


"Yeah....."


"MOM! GET OFF THE LINE!"

*click*




*ring ring*




*ring ring*




*ring ring*




"It's Candy..."



"Tony?"


"No sugar, it's CANDY..."



"....."


"Candy sugar, Candy can do whatever you want her to..."



"......Tony? Can Tony come out to pway?"


"Who's Tony baby, tell Candy who Tony is...?



"Me touch Tony now...Tony stands up straight! ATTENTION!"


"Oh....right....Do you want Candy to kiss Tony?"


"You kiss Tony, Tony will spit in your eye! He gots a funny helmet on...ATTENTION!"


"I'm kissing Tony now sugar, rubbing his little helmet..."


"Sometimes Mommy won't let Tony come out to pway....but I tells mommy, Tony my soldier! I wike pwaying with soldier Tony.....ATTENTION!"


*click*




"Sometimes I wish Mommy would pway with Tony too...Mommy always makes Tony stand up wike a widdle Soldier! ATTENTION!"



"GEORGE DUBYA BUSH, WHAT ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH ARE YOU DOING?"


"................yes if congress will only ratify that Bill in their next sitting then we can move forward with the invasion, hopefully as early as next week...."


"What the hell you talking about sugar, don't you want to stick little soldier Tony in Candy's foxhole?"



"WHO IS THAT WHORE? GEORGE DUBYA BUSH, YOU ARE IN EXTREME TROUBLE YOUNG MAN! Oh...wait a moment...."



"Bye Colin...same time next week...don't wear anything too....complicated..."


"Mommy?"




"YOU STAY ON THIS LINE YOUNG MAN, I'M NOT FINISHED WITH YOU....AS FOR YOU YOUNG LADY, YOU HANG UP THIS PHONE IMMEDIATELY, NO SLEAZY TRAMP IS GOING TO PLAY WITH MY BUSH!"


"Suck my fuck Crack Whore, I'm gone..."



*click*




"Mommy?"


"Mommy?"


"Mommy?"



"Yes baby...Mommy's here. Is Tony gone?"


"No Mommy, Tony stand up straight like a good widdle soldier! ATTENTION!"



"Excellent..."